I’m a sensitive New Age man
With very sensitive ears
So don’t yell or shout at me
In anger or with glee
With orders or with jeers

It’s hard enough with people
Now machines are in the act
Beeping, buzzing, demanding
Insistent, unstoppable
Saying ‘You’d better react’

Machines used to be mute
Until some inventor
Decided to be cute
And give the beasts a voice
No one had a choice

I’m talking to you, motor car
Your caterwauling beeps
As people struggle with seat belts
Can make old people weep
And awaken children who are asleep

Noisy machines have invaded kitchens
The fridge with its ding, ding, ding thing
And microwaves time you out
Their insistent, hectoring sounds
Loud and annoying to be around

Don’t get me started on mobile phones
With their ‘devil calling’ ringtones
Calling at the worst moments
Interrupting us during pleasant times
It really should be a crime

It’s hard enough with people
Now machines are in the act
Beeping, buzzing, demanding
Insistent, unstoppable
Saying ‘You’d better react.’